Nike, A Race to Remember

It has been quite some time since I've blogged, for no better reason than laziness and not a ton to write about since I missed recapping adventures from Summer racing.

I flew to San Fran last Friday afternoon, later than the Team because I had to work, and was thrilled to get away for this long awaited weekend.  Sat was filled with the "expo" (that was not really an expo) and a search for running shorts - which I had to buy because I left mine at home (dummy).  After stops at about 7 stores, I found a pair of spandex that were long enough at Macy's.  Note to self: Nike does not make many pairs of shorts that cover your ass; 4 inch inseams do NOT cut it.  I was lucky to catch up with my Uncle Eddie and family for a little while Sat afternoon; it was really nice and I only wish I had more time out there.

My TNT singlet, with all of the names of those I ran for.

Sat night was the TNT Inspiration Dinner.  Having worked many TNT events, I have always loved this.  This red carpet (aka the cheer squad when you arrive) was tremendous!  I have always got a little teared up at these, and I definitely did at the long line of TNT staff and coaches cheering us participants on - with a special friend at the end, Erica :)  A super exciting surprise was having the founder of TNT, Bruce Cleland, and his daughter, Georgia there as this is the 25th anniversary or TNT.  This made me even more emotional, as Bruce started TNT to honor his daughter as she was battling a blood cancer.  Bruce invented this amazing program, and it was my honor to run this race with Georgia.  And our mission moment was delivered by a very special little girl, Mickey, and her mom.  Mickey has beat her blood cancer as a child with Down's Syndrome as well.  She was so adorable delivering her speech, and Mickey ran and walked 13.1 miles in memory of her own patient heroes.  She is the definition of determination. This was the perfect way to send off us participants, and get us motivated for the big day ahead.

After decorating our singlets with our small EPA TNT team, we prepped for bed and the next morning.  After stretching, I meticulously wrote the names of the 29 people I was running in honor and in memory of on my arm as my race "playlist" - to refer to on race day when I needed a reminder of why I needed to push on during the rough patches of race day.  These individuals are where I draw my inspiration, they are my heroes.

My heroes.

Race morning always comes so quick.  After getting everything together and forcing down my traditional bagel with PB, it was off to our starting corrals.  After a quick goodbye to Doreen and best wishes.  Despite hearing how crowded Nike is, I somehow seated myself very fast (HA) and was in the first corral, which positioned me very well to start the race.  I was able to stretch and relax prior to the start of the race, but the fireworks after the national anthem (only at a women's race) were a fancy start to my marathon.  Along with thoughts of Uncle Willie.

The first miles were fast and downhill.  I met a friend around mile 3, Karen, who ran with me until about mile 6.5 by chance.  Chatting about racing and tri's was a nice distraction early on.  Mile 6 came the "big" hill (note: there were very many hills).  I took this with caution, purposefully and lost Karen.  As I started to feel winded and thought of David W., who this mile was for.  This helped carry me up the hill to Little Bear, who greeted me with big cheers and pics!

Photo Credit Erica Jane Boles.

Mile 11 marked the half marathon split, which was a tease because at mile 15 we met back up with the half folks as they were finishing.  Around mile 13.5, I met up with a friendly TNT face, Stella from the NJ Chapter who I've met through Dor as she did Timberman with EPA.  We ran together for about half a mile, enough to push one another through a tired few minutes.  Then at mile 14, I found my friend Liane, who now lives in SF.  She gave me a big hug and made me really happy!

I held my own for the beginning few miles starting on the 10 mile out and back on the highway, which I knew was the boring, but supposedly flat part of the course.  Well, I started to slow down (as anticipated) but was surprised at how many "hills" there still were.  Mile 18 felt not great and 19 was worse, but I thought of Mickey and then Mr. Donovan.  I had some strategic heroes placed for miles 18 on.  At 20, I got a boost as this was dedicated to Mrs. Massimini, Mike's Mom and the woman I have been robbed of meeting.  October 20 marks the anniversary she passed away, and race day was the 12th anniversary.  Right as I thought of her, the sun came out and I smiled.  This helped and was very special.  

However, about half a mile later I felt myself crashing into "the wall."  This is what ever marathoner dreads.  I kept thinking Erica will be here soon, but she got stuck in traffic getting to cheer station 2.  My telling myself "only 6.2 miles left turned" and quickly that turned into "WTF 6.2 miles left?!?"  Then, one of our national TNT coaches (we had no EPA TNT coach or staff) appeared.  Jen from MD was my savior.  I must have looked like I needed a boost as she was the first coach to come run with me, and upon asking how I was and who I was running for, I lost it and shed some tears as I told her I thought I was hitting the wall and that I was running for many, but right now specifically for Mrs. Mass at mile 20.  Her response was amazing, a simple "there is no wall, and we will get through this together!"  Jen stayed with me for 3 miles, and during the last one up one of those annoying "hills" we met another friend, Orlando, a TNT friend from NY.  We ended up running the rest of the race together, which helped a lot in pushing one another to the finish.  

At mile 24, Liane showed up on Izzy, her bike and my bike's twin :)  She rode with us, sharing stories to pass the final, painful miles before speeding up so she could capture some pics during mile 25.  Having Liane as my personal cheerleader was really amazing.  

The final mile was filled with TNT coaches and spectators cheering, and I got my final kick to bang out an 8:30 pace for the last half mile (which felt incredibly fast at the time ha).  The support was amazing and I thought of all the people I was running for, especially those who I've lost and my Dad.  I thought I'd lose it at the finish, but I was just really, really happy!  Happy to have carried my heroes with me, happy to have done this in Uncle Willie's memory and to have thought of Aunt Stella at mile 25, happy to be done, and happy to have my first standalone marathon in the books, with TNT!  And happy to have some new, shiny Tiffany's bling :)

The race was challenging, the hills were no joke (and btw, there WERE hills in the last 10 miles despite what people said), but the experience was completely worth it.  Feeling wonderful to have been apart of a team that raised $30,000 among just 9 people, and a national team that raised $9M this year for Nike.  Thanks for all of the support I've had, and so glad I was able to share this with my fav too.

I feel like I'm finally getting back my endurance and am ready for another big year.  Let's hope the speed comes too because it's needed as I have some PR's to chase ;) 

Celebratory breakfast with Liane.

My Silver Linings Playbook

"This is family business, and this is for the family who can't be with us."

The past couple weeks have been filled with tiredness, some stress and not nearly as much physical activity as planned.  Life happened.  

A week and a half ago, my Uncle Willie lost his battle with cancer.  Or as his pastor said, he has now beat cancer and is cancer free.  The positive of course is he is at peace.  We have been processing this as it all happened so quickly, in just 6 short weeks.  We had limited time as a family, and it has been very difficult on my Dad.  The memorial service was last Saturday, and it was really a wonderful tribute to his life.  I learned, or was rather reminded, that Willie was one of the nicest people you would ever meet.  Someone who everyone liked, and who introduced my parents to one another.  Dad spoke at the service and did a great job.  The biggest positive from an extremely sad situation was what my Dad shared, that in light of a terrible situation the positive that resulted was our family reuniting with extended family we had lost touch with.  Silver lining.  Life is too short to not love the time we have with family, and we won't take that for granted.  I'll race for those loved ones I'll always hold in my heart, in their beloved memory.

It has been a busy time at work, the non-profit 4th quarter.  Long hours have cut a bit into my Andrea time aka training.  So as Philly Tri or Tri Rock Philly rapidly approached, nerves were setting in and excitement was not overwhelmingly there.  My best training partner reminded me that we do tri's for the love of the sport, for fun.  So true, and accepted what would undoubtedly be a tough day to share with a lot of close friends.  Entered the weekend very tired, after a long week and after an emotional day.  Didn't put a lot of pressure on myself.  Silver lining: no real expectations, that resulted in a 3-minute PR on Sunday and the best Olympic swim I've had to date.  It hurt and wasn't exactly easy, but I channeled my Uncle during the swim (my least favorite) and during the most challenging parts of the day (the second half of the run in the heat).  Putting things into perspective, and racing for others is why I fell I love with triathlon to begin with.  

The result of the weekend = time with those I love, for better or worse.  Getting together with my family on Saturday is always a great thing, even if for sad reasons.  Getting in touch with more cousins is amazing, and I hope to keep and maintain the great bonds I've recently began to form.  And Sunday was a day with my triathlon family, a group of people who are a huge support network and some of my dearest friends.  Sharing first races with two good friends, Alyssa and Kevin, was amazing.  Racing with some of my tri buddies is always wonderful, and sharing another weekend with one of my closest and most valued friends, Doreen, is something I will always treasure.

Tonight I did recovery yoga with Tara.  At the end, our instructor asked us to close our eyes in prayer pose and fill in the blank for "today I feel lucky for ___"...and all I could think was my friends and family.  And then I smiled.  Even though the whole weekend wasn't filled with happy things, in the end everything has led to happiness in one way or another.  And although tired from it, I feel blessed and very lucky.  

One of my favorite Dave songs has been stuck in my head because it's fitting in so many ways lately..."Celebrate we will, 'cause life is short but sweet for certain."

“This is what I believe to be true. You have to do everything you can. You have to work your hardest. And if you do, if you stay positive, then you have a shot at a silver lining.” 

Family Matters

So I bit the bullet and signed up for my first standalone marathon, the Nike Women's Marathon in San Fran on October 20.  Decided, as I always said, that this would be my first on it's own marathon.  And that I'd do it with Team In Training.  Felt drawn to do this for my Uncle. 

When I do TNT events, it's not just about blood cancers but rather for all people I care about who've been impacted by cancer.  By doing my piece of fundraising, I know I'm helping to make a difference.  Same goes for when I fundraise for AHA and MS.  These are my three passions.  But for now, the focus is cancer because of Uncle Willie.

My parents hosted a family get together for Uncle Willie and his brothers and family.  It had been years since I saw him and his kids, my cousins, and I had never met his brothers.  It was so nice to see everyone, and celebrate Uncle Willie as a family while everyone was on the East Coast.  Mom got this great pic. 

Extended fam with Uncle Willie in the middle, celebrating life together.

Family is so important.  And it gives us purpose.  Celebrating time together.

Feeling like I have even more purpose now to do Nike.  I signed up in honor of Uncle Willie, to tackle my first "legit" marathon - and what better way to feel driven for the event then to dedicate it to people you love.

My TNT friends are like another family, and feeling pretty blessed to have them.  It's been really nice to be reminded of this, even more than I always am through signing up for Nike.  I've started my list of everyone who has been touched by cancer to run each mile for them.  How can you not go on when you are running for people who might not be able to?  Not possible. 

Grateful for our short bbq to spend time with this family.  And to making the most of time we have together.  And hoping there can be some more quality time together while we are able to take advantage of it. 

Life's too short so "celebrate we will, 'cause life is short but sweet for certain."

Now, run.  And know it's for so much more than just a race.

And, use that in all of your training, for those who might not be able to do what you do.  This will help me continue to drive to get back into the groove, and force me to stay there.

These are my thoughts...time to take care of business some more.

A Purpose-Driven Life

Sometimes we all need a smack in the face, a reminder of why we do the work we do.  In life, work and our personal lives.  It can be easy to lose sight of things in everyday life.  But reminders serve to give us purpose in life, in all of those areas. 

We just wrapped up a big week of Heart Association events.  One of my favorite and personal big events was Home Runs For Heart.  The mission piece we highlighted was the story of one of my good friends, Derek Fitzgerald.  I've heard his story so many times, but it still chokes me up.  Last weekend Derek asked me to join him on an organized bike ride as part of his TNT and IM training, and we shared a long 67 fun-filled miles together.  And last night Fox aired a piece on Derek they filmed just after HRFH.  Of course almost made me cry.  And watching it today was just the reminder I needed as to why I work for the AHA, why I got into non-profit.  This is why I worked at LLS.  Fundraising has always been a passion of mine since grade school when I got involved with MS.  While not easy, it is extremely fulfilling to be reminded that work I do is raising life-saving money to fund research and education efforts.  And during the craziness of the past weeks, I needed a big reminder of this. 

Also recently my family received the extremely sad news that my Dad's cousin, my Uncle Willie, has terminal cancer.  Uncle Willie was like a brother to my Dad growing up, and as they had us kids they just grew apart as their lives became busier and busier.  Two weeks ago we got the news as my parents drove back from Golden.  It was found very late, lung cancer, that has metatisised to so many places and now his brain.  This has been a wake-up call to my parents and the family.  Life's too short.  Now, my parents are making up for lost time with Uncle Willie, and helping him to make the most of his time left by crossing off a few bucket list items.  Cancer freaking sucks.  And this is the wake-up call (that I didn't necessarily need a reminder for) that cancer, like heart disease, doesn't discriminate for them.  But reminded me of my purpose.  Also a reminder that we need to do more to fight these terrible diseases.  That my work is never done. 

The non-profit life has defined so much of the person I became in my 20's.  I've met amazing people, who have forever changed me for the better.  They are constant reminders of purpose for my life.  And sometimes it's good to be reminded of the people who impacted your life. 

These are two examples of why I started training for triathlon.  To honor and remember survivors and those who have lost their battles to illness.  So on those tough days, I'll be sure to dig a little deeper this season for Derek, Uncle Willie, my Dad, Granddad, Pop-Pop, Aunt Stella, Mrs. Remley, Mrs. Massimini, Mr. Mestichelli, Mr. Donovan, Aunt Sandy, Curt, David, Steve, and the so many other people I can and will think of. 

Remember your purpose and use it to find extra strength when you need it.  A wise woman told me this was a great reminder of why we train just a couple weeks ago, and I guess I just needed my own personal reminders of my own purpose to embrace it (thanks).

How Andrea Got Her Groove Back

2013 training has been interesting.  Ironman training kinda ruins you for future training, shorter trainings never seem long enough and that can turn into frustration.  While it might not be perfect, I think I'm finally on the right track.

Two weeks before the St. Luke's Half Marathon I ran my longest run since last summer at 14 miles, and for once in a long time felt pretty strong.  Had a couple good training runs mid-week as well.  Race day came up fast.  While long run-wise I was on track, my actual training was not up to par.  Lack of speed work, barely getting in 2 runs per week, slow times...recipe for disaster.  But I tried to adopt the attitude to just have fun and not put so much pressure on myself on race day.  It went fairly well, not a PR, but not my worst time by a longshot.  I smiled and cheered for friends and thanked volunteers.  The posse all had great races, and I couldn't have been happier to share in all of that.  And I got to run with a TNT friend for a lot of the race, Jackie, who totally kept my spirits up and me focused. 

I was reminded to always respect the race distance.  A lot of people have asked if 13.1 miles was not enough.  In theory, yes of course in comparison it seems a lot shorter.  But, I have always been of the school of thought that you should always respect the race distance because each distance is challenging in it's own way.  It's true.  My lack of speed prep was apparent on race day, and the last 3 miles my legs were shot.  But I dug deep and of course forced myself to continue on.  To everyone, some race will be very challenging.  And I totally respect that.  St. Luke's was a good reminder to me to respect every race I do.  While I could muscle one out most of the time, to actually race well always requires training and a plan.  We all need to be grounded sometimes.

A week later I did a 38 mile ride, my longest to date which again seems like not enough.  But the hills were a challenge and I really enjoyed it, with good company of course (Doreen).

While I might not have done great with a plan consistently this year, I'm reminded of how challenging training for any distance can be when life gets in the way.  But the best thing is that I'm enjoying it, and know I'm finally getting out of that funk and moving on to better things. 

Time to get back on the horse.  Not sure what snapped me back into action, even though it has been gradual.  Maybe the warmer temps and sunshine.  Maybe I just really needed some down time, and my body was trying to tell me.  Who knows.  All I know is Andrea is finally getting her groove back, and it's about dang time.

Reflecting on 2012

2012, the year I became a man, an Ironman.  I have meant to post something for weeks.  Motivation to get back into action has been tough, training and mentally-wise...but I've realized it's because a hell of a lot happened in the past few months.  I think my body and mind needed some down time. 

2012 was a ridic year for ACG, but probably the best of my life (with other huge life accomplishments aside).  July 22, 2012 is a day I'll never forget, but 2012 the year also physically included PR's in the half marathon and Olympic distance tri, and one of the best MS rides of my life.  Not only did I complete a lifelong goal before turning 30, but I also had a huge year professionally.  Challenges arose of course during the same exact time of my heavy training (naturally).  But that's life, everything seems to happen at once, right?  I believe we are given only what we can "endure" so it must have all been dealt to me at once for a reason.  It's hard to even reflect on all the emotions I felt last summer, but it was stressful, challenging, emotional, and spectacular all at the same time. 

My Ironman journey made me really get to know myself again.  When you embark on something like this, you need to be at peace with learning a lot about yourself...some of which you may not like.  I was not always easy to deal with, I was cranky and could get angry/emotional extremely easy.  My loved ones knew this all too well.  But, on the flip side, I learned that I can "endure" a hell of a lot while multitasking my career, relationships and other life responsibilities. 

Most importantly, I learned that I do really like the person I've become.  Sure, I have many shortcomings and imperfections, like anyone else.  But I know that if I put my mind to something, I'll figure it out one way or another.  "I am vindicated."  I embraced my passion for life and people.  I love that I wear my emotions and heart on my sleeve.  I learned that I'm kind of gross ha, and I really don't mind that!  I like that I'm not a prissy girl, I'm an athlete.  I like playing the professional businesswoman during the day, and really like getting sweaty and dirty after 5 pm to push myself to my limits.  I know I've met some truly incredible people as a result of my life's path, most recently through triathlon/endurance sports and my non-profit work.  And I wouldn't trade any of that for the world.  They enrich my life in so many ways, and have made me a better person.  Some have become my best friends, and I love you for loving me for me. 

2012 was full of up's and down's, but closing it out the up's so outweigh any of the down's...they just made me a stronger person.

"Endure"...I keep using that word because 2012 taught me that this is really a mantra for me.  It's been on my Road ID as a quote, with TCB of course.  But it's a way of life for me.  Natually, in training and Ironman, this is the definition of "endure" to me.  But also in my personal life and career.  You need to "endure" to come out on top, to achieve your goals.  And the journey is never really over because there are always more goals and accomplishments to achieve.  But going through the process is what makes everything so rewarding.  I "endure" it all, and will continue to do so.  When things are/get tough, I can push through.  "Dark clouds may hang on me sometimes, but I'll work it out."

My blog may be far less exciting now, and I'm sure I won't have too much exiting to post.  My year of the new journey is over, but now different adventures begin.  2013 will include some new goals, mostly focusing on pushing myself in different ways, working on speed, faster PR's and a Half IM.  Here's to hoping all goes well, and that Placid will be back on my radar for 2014...yes, feeling a huge draw back to that magical place.  And to making new, wonderful memories all along the way. 

2012 is a year I'll never forget, a huge milestone year in my life.  And I'll never be the same because of it.  And I'm just fine with that :)  I'll "endure" what is to come in 2013 and beyond. 

I'll be sure to "celebrate...'cause life is short but sweet for certain".

Ramblings of an Ironman

Some random thoughts I have...distorted perceptions of reality I have come to embrace, here they are:

After months of fighting the penis/dick knees and a permanent racerback on my back, I have come to kind of like my sweet, strange tan lines.  I feel like this is a real tan. 

I secretly love (not even just like) when I get a "chain tatoo" on my calf from my bike.

Snickers and M&M's are totally great cycling snacks.

I now hate Gatorade and prefer "donkey piss" aka Ironman Perform.

I feel like I could fairly easily ride a Century ride most weekends.  (Well, maybe not in the offseason!)

An hour workout seems short...

I sometimes feel a little slackerish on Saturday and Sunday afternoons when my workouts are well over and I'm doing something relaxing now.

I feel the need to fill all water bottle cages, even if it is a short ride.

2400 feet of climbing seems like NBD.

I feel more sore and tight now than last summer?

It was delightful to get drunk after one beer.  I still feel like more of a lightweight than previously...which is kinda awesome.

Ironman training = a great ass.

I'm skilled at the art of air hankies, sometimes ;)

Coming off the high

My last day in Placid was filled with packing, an Olympic sports simulation and tour of the ice rinks, walking around town and shopping, and QT with some fam and friends.  It was a beautiful day last Wed, and of course was the day to leave, sigh.  Wanted to go to a watering hole or paddle board or hike or swim...anything outside. 

We got in the car to finally leave town, and I got quiet.  Mike knew something was up and asked what was wrong.  I just said I'm really really sad to leave Placid.  And I was.  I still am.  Driving off was really difficult, and that may sound childish like I don't want to leave vacation, but I did feel immediate sadness.

Sad because I simply love it there.  It is beautiful, serene, fun, and now filled with a very special memory of my first Ironman - something that will never be tainted and always extremely special as one of the biggest days in my life.  I loved Placid before I ever knew I would be an Ironman, from working the marathon up there.  I loved it when I went up to train in May.  And now I love it that much more.

I mean heck it is a place filled with greatness.  How can you not be in awe thinking about the 1980 Winter Games?  "Do you believe in miracles?!?!"  Fantastic memory and of course movie.  And the '32 games also hosted in this magical place.  You see the Legends of the Oval, and tour the Olympic facilities and feel the power of the Olympics.  Call me nostalgic and yes I love the Olympics, but that is something amazing.

And we, as Ironmen, get to be on these grounds to compete in an endurance race beyond so many of us.  To test ourselves with 2700 of our "closest" friends.  Oh and don't forget that our last yards of the Ironman are run in the Olympic Oval, to finish the race we set out to start at 7 am.  Nothing short of amazing.  Not to mention, this year's IM was right before the 2012 Olympics.  I got chills thinking about it.

But the IM aside, the scenery is beautiful and there is just something about that place I loved from the first day I ever arrived there.  I felt similar about Hawaii, Scranton (laugh if you will, but it felt like home for college), the Outerbanks, and Estonia. 

AND not only was I very sad to leave Placid, in the days since I've been home and settling back into "real life" I have become more sad.  Sad that the experience is over, for now.  To devote so much time to this huge personal goal and have the day itself be such a big high point in my life is...wonderful, fabulous, indescribable.  And now it's over.  Talk about your adrenaline dump.  Mike says he was worried this would happen, and I was a little too.  But how do you prepare for that?  I don't think I could've. 

This takes nothing away from my day and accomplishment, it couldn't.  It is just a little sad.  Is this normal?  I'd like to think so.  I asked my IM friends and coach.  Verdict seems to be in my favor, that I'm not crazy (despite what you may think!). 

What next?  Who knows, I'm not too worried about that.  No, there will not be an IM next year.  My boyfriend, family, friends, myself, and especially my wallet need a break.  Maybe some other tri's, maybe a marathon?  Don't know yet.  Maybe gymnastics?  Yes, you read that right.  More on that later, Mike Massimini style. 

Monday was the icing on the cake.  Back to work after being off to recoop last week.  I think it just made me really feel it.  I'm ok, don't get me wrong, just wish I could always relive that day.  Good thing I have amazing people to remind me how proud of me they are :)  And waiting on pictures and videos!  And the wonderful gifts I got and things people have done for me.

Coming off the high and having the adrenaline dump are real issues, but I'm fine.  I'll get over it.  I'll have that next thing in to focus on.  But nothing will replace this experience and Lake Placid will always be a special place in my heart, and I will always love both and treasure July 22, 2012. 

So I never published this...don't really know why...but as this "depression" as I called my IM letdown last for awhile...longer than I anticipated.  Probably longer than a month.  But all is well of course.  I think just having dedicated the better part of year to an incredible goal will do that to you.  Reading what I wrote then brings me back, and I will never, ever forget the incredible journay I took.  How could I? 

"Finish Line Fever" is a real thing, folks.  People may think we triathletes are nuts, but I gotta tell you there is nothing quite like it.  It's our drug of choice, and I'm blessed to have experienced it...and will again, hopefully in 2014 ;)